Cactus and Cousins
Updated: Jul 29, 2021
I’m not a fan of the cactus in general. I like those little tiny succulents, especially the bright pink or yellow ones! And, I do like a prickly pear jelly which is delicious on a breakfast burrito. But I’ve been in the Arizona desert and run into some of the sharpest needles that side of the Mississippi. I didn’t actually run into it. I was chased into it by my mean, older cousin who knew exactly what he was doing because he lived in Arizona and just wanted for me to have that desert cactus experience! Now you know why I’m not a fan of the cactus...or certain cousins! (BTW he grew up to be pretty cool!)
But, these days - and by ‘these days’ I mean as a person in her second half of life - I’m not in such a big a hurry. Maybe because no one is chasing me any more. Every once in a while my husband pretends he's going to chase me in that playful way young loves do but then we bust out laughing and eat ice cream on the couch. Where was I? Oh yes… add to those days, these days of the Covid19 pandemic where we really have more time than we ever wanted to slow down and suddenly we notice things that we had previously been in too big of a hurry to stop and look at.
Today on my walk (let’s face it, I’m not about to run because I’m not chasing anyone either) I stopped and noticed a huge cactus taking up a large chunk of a neighbor’s yard. What I noticed was that one cactus pad had several stages of the flower represented at the same time...from just beginning to blossom to the fully mature. The contrast was amazing! Each stage was unique and beautiful…just like people. And speaking of people...I know the temptation is to look at someone who is obviously immature in their thinking and behaving and think…”why don’t you mature, already?”
I wondered that about my cousin in Arizona. He was such an immature 10 year old!
Those flowers will bloom when it is time and so will people. My anxiety over wishing it to be otherwise only shows my immaturity. If I am conscious of my thoughts I can quickly let go of the need for things to be different than they are.
When I focus on the weaknesses of others then this is a signal that I have regressed into lower levels of consciousness. When I begin to blame others for not seeing things my way I am denying my own power and giving control to someone else. This is not being passive...it is being responsible for the only thing I am in control of...my thoughts.
It is so exhilarating when we first begin to blossom when we’ve begun the journey of growth with the Enneagram or ANYTHING that awakens us to new levels of consciousness. We feel seen and understood and, naturally, we want to share our new found sense of freedom. But many will not be interested because it is NOT THE RIGHT TIME for them. "But the right person or situation will come along at the right time to teach them what they need to know.” (Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth..Awakening to Your Life's Purpose)
When will we seek change? When what we have been doing is no longer workable.
If the Enneagram is the right tool for you then I hope it leads you to being the healthiest you possible. And maybe through your growth your friends and family will want to know about it. Maybe not. But for goodness sake don't push anyone into it or they just might feel the same way I did when my cousin introduced me to that Arizona cactus!
(Have you heard this podcast…”The Enneagram May Not Be For Everyone").
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